I got married 6 days after my 20th birthday. I used to have a very skewed vision of marriage; that a “good marriage” looks like magazine-image perfection. If a marriage looks like anything other than perfect smiles and happy days, that there’s something wrong with it.
I learned very quickly that marriage is hard work. But it’s so worth it. It has not been all sunshine and roses, to say the least. But even on my worst day, I’m still so happy that I’m married. I have many reasons why I’m thankful for my imperfect marriage, but here are some of my favorites.
10 Reasons I’m Glad I’m Married (Even When I Don’t Like My Husband)
I have a voice of reason
“Let’s repaint the WHOLE HOUSE! TODAY!” He just looks at me. He’s heard some sweeping, crazy declaration of productivity from me before. But after all this time, he knows better than to say anything other than “how about we all go for a hike instead?” He wins. Every time.
I have someone to balance me out
“We really need to keep an eye on our spending this week! Last week we exceeded our grocery budget by $.15! Oh hey, Valentine’s day is this weekend… I want the 6 carat platinum ring from Tiffany’s… But that $.15 is haunting me!” He knows that I really want him to get me something for Valentine’s day, but I also want him to remember how much I love saving money. He knows very well that when I calm down about that $.15, I’ll want something realistic. And (usually) he knows what to get.
I have a friend
The first time we hung out together, we spent almost 9 straight hours talking. Since then, maintaining a friendship has been so important (and sometimes overlooked) for us. When we’re able to be friends, we can function much better.
I have a lover
I don’t think I need to get into this one a whole lot, but physical love IS an important part of marriage. And that’s all I’ll say about that. To quote (possibly the best-) best man speech at a friend’s wedding “keep all of the ups and downs between you under the sheets.”
I have a partner
We’re in this together. The crazy life that we’ve made for ourselves. Better or worse, richer or poorer. We’re both in it together.
I have a helper
When the baby is crying and the big kids are yelling about being hungry for the 80th time before 11am, It’s good to have an extra set of hands. Yes, my husband is their parent too. But 99.999% of the time, they come to mom with their problems. We have efficiently stood together to face problems and we’ve divided and conquered for the same problems. Whether it’s “the house is a mess and we’re having guests” or “I have doctor’s appointments and the grocery shopping needs to get done all in the same one hour time slot,” we’ve become very proficient in playing to our strengths.
I have a shoulder to cry on
I’m not the crying type. But sometimes the best medicine is a good cry. And when I need someone to cry on, my husband is there. And usually he offers me chocolate after (pluses of marrying a guy with 5 sisters).
I have a shoulder to lean on
We’ve been through some really tough times. Even personally, I’ve been through some very difficult trials. But nothing, to me, exemplifies having someone to lean on quite like my home birth. Both physically and emotionally, my husband was there to support me.
I have someone who doesn’t judge me
Since we first met, I gained 60 pounds in my first pregnancy, couldn’t seem to get rid of the last 20 pounds of it, started to lose it, then promptly got pregnant again, and again. I’m hardly the girl I was from college, but he still loves me. I forgot to take off my mascara from the night before and he didn’t tell me about my raccoon eyes because he still thought I was beautiful. I could stay in my PJs all day and he wouldn’t bat an eye. Never once has he spoken unkindly about me. And, as someone with severely damaged self esteem, I’m so thankful for that.
I have someone who chose to come with me every step of the way in life
He knows my struggles, my fears, my triumphs, my hopes, my dreams, and my mishaps (like every time I cook bacon, almost burn the house down). He knows my whole story. And I know his.
Genesis 2:24 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” We share this crazy life that we made together, and only we know the story of how we got here. The fights, the love, the tears, the laughs… every step that we take in this marriage, we take it together.
Yes even though they drive us utterly crazy at times we wouldn’t like to be without them. #twinklytuesday
This is so lovely to read. You read so much about marriages failing and people ‘staying together for the kids’ etc or even about making date nights, having to put in a huge effort, but it’s really great reading the day to day greatness of being married. From someone who is currently planning a wedding! So Thank you!
#twinklytuesday
Sounds like you’ve got a definite keeper!! This post was so sweet. I love that you focused on all the positive aspects. While I’m not married, I do turn to my boyfriend a lot! He doesn’t have any sisters, so he hasn’t caught on to the chocolate memo yet 😉 haha – Thank you so much for linking up with the Let’s Be Friends Blog Hop 🙂
xo, Mattie
http://www.mattiesmakings.com
What a beautiful post about marriage! I’ve been married for 8 years now and agree wholeheartedly with your entire list! Marriage isn’t perfect, but it sure is wonderful. #TwinklyTuesday
I love being married because I always have a friend. Also someone to go through life’s many crazy challenges together. It makes my life so much better 🙂 Thanks for your thoughts on this.
I love being with Hun and I’m oh so happy we discovered one another and committed to building and cherishing a life together. Last night, I just said to him (after some hard moments on my part), I want to still look at you in 5 or 10 or more years and not just love you, but like you. I don’t want to lose that. Of course, he agreed and we are a-ok! It was helpful for me to let him know things have been tough with the kids lately and how feeling disconnected was hurting me 🙂
Awe, this is so sweet. I can hear your love for your husband coming out through your words. Thanks for uplifting marriage – it is truly so, so sweet! Thanks for sharing on the Faith Filled Parenting Linkup!
Oh, love this! So true. My husband drives me inSANE sometimes, but I wouldn’t trade him for the world. He definitely balances me out!
This is so lovely and inspiring! I’m not married yet, we’re planning to get married in 2017. Thanks for linking up to #HappyDaysLinky x
What a sweet post! I love this. As I read, I could see a lot of those positives in my own hubby, and it’s always so great to focus on the positives. You wouldn’t want him to only think about your negatives, so you shouldn’t do that to him either. 🙂
This was so sweet! My husband is the same way–I’ll have raccoon eyes and he won’t even mention it. Lol. Sometimes I wish he would and he doesn’t judge me when I have a busy day and didn’t get anything done around the house. He just jumps in to help! I love that about him.
I don’t know what I would do without my other half. We have a sign in our bedroom ‘love isn’t finding someone you can live with, it is finding someone you can’t live without’ and it is entirely true in my case. Thank you for joining in #HappyDaysLinky x
Aw this is the sweetest! There’s times my hubby drives my absolutely nuts but all the great things balance it out! I love the voice of reason one. Ha!
Beautiful! It sounds like your imperfect pairing is pretty spot on. And thank you for making me know that mine is too! Arent we lucky!
Hi Caroline, this is a great post. I have chosen it as my feature from last week’s #OMHGWW Linkup! Thanks for sharing it with us all.
Shellie
http://www.thefabjourney.com
Aww… This is such a cute post. Sometimes being paired with the imperfect makes it perfect. Hope you Wishing you a fab Valentine’s Day to both of you. Thank you much for linking up with us at #FabFridayPost
Great post! I don’t know what it is but when i need a shoulder to cry on, I go to my husband and the tears just pour out! Then I feel sooo much better. Thanks so much for linking up at Monday of Many Blessings Link Up!! I hope to see you again. http://ourhomeofmanyblessings.com/
Aw that’s so sweet; and sums it all up so nicely!
There’s a lot to be said for those “better and for worse” vows that we took. The commitment to each other and knowing that someone is always there for you is so awesome. We’ve been going strong for 33 years and the shoulder to lean on is so important. Thanks for sharing on our #OTM link up ~ Leanne
I love this ha especially the title! 😉 They are your best friend but also the one who can drive you the most insane, but then no great relationship was ever built on apathy!
Thank you for linking up to #PicknMix
Stevie x
What a sweet and uplifting read. It’s so encouraging to see your beautiful relationship!
What a nice list you put together. Thanks for sharing at Thursday Favorite Things Blog Hop!
This is so true! I don’t always like my husband, but I can’t imagine life without him. All of these reasons are exactly why! Thanks so much for sharing at the Best of the Blogosphere Link-Up! Hope to see you again tomorrow 🙂